So What Now? Graduating College and Moving On

By Sabrina Oliveri

My last semester of college is now over. When I tell people that I just finished my last semester as an undergrad, they all ask the same question:

“So what now?”

The answer is not simple. Now, I’m auditing my life. I’m preparing myself for the opportunities ahead. I’m applying for jobs and grad schools, praying something pans out. In the spring, I will start another internship, hoping to gain just enough experience to be considered a worthwhile candidate for future positions. My dad needs someone to help with his administrative work, so I decided to help him. Finally, I will be putting more of my energy into Staged.

There is so much I’m doing now, and yet none of these answers feel acceptable. I wasn’t headhunted for a full-time role before I graduated. My parents didn’t set me up with an amazing opportunity that one of their friends had. I’m not going to travel the world. I’m just doing what I always do: working as hard as I can at building a future for myself.

People sound shocked when I tell them about the responsibilities I am juggling. Most people think I’m crazy, but so many others are in the same boat. Making money so they can afford what they actually want to do and finding alternative fulfillment in the meantime.

Graduation may mark the end of my undergraduate education, but it is not the end of my academic journey. Over the next nine months, I have decisions to make. Where should I go to graduate school? What do I do if I don’t get into the schools I want? Do I start looking for full-time opportunities now? Should I take on another job so I can save more money?

For someone who loves to plan, the next nine months of my life horrify me. There is so much unknown and so much to be grateful for. Yet, none of it feels particularly hopeful. Like many of my fellow recent college graduates, I have been applying for jobs endlessly over the past year. The second fall internships start, applications for spring and summer internships open up. It’s a never-ending cycle of job searching that seems to be fruitless, even when you get a position.

Hopelessness, anxiety, and very little excitement permeate conversations among recent college graduates. While I was excited to finally be done with my undergrad, it quickly fizzled out, and something new appeared in its place: dread. I did not want to apply for colleges all over again and submit more resumes to dozens of jobs, hoping someone somewhere would give me a chance. The closer deadlines come, the more dread turns into fear and anxiety.

It feels as though who I am will never be enough to get me where I want to be. So I started setting goals for myself. This year is a year of adventure, putting myself out there in order to gain new experiences. If I’m going to be nervous about the future, then I’m going to use it as fuel for other activities that I have been too nervous to start.

The more occupied I become, the less I worry. As I overcome my fears of rejection in other areas of my life, the less nervous I am about my future. My college classes are over (for now), and a new year has begun.

This is my year. It’s the year I will leap out of my comfort zone and into situations that heighten my anxiety. If I am going to be anxious, I would rather be out living my life than sitting at home with my head down while I slave over a laptop. Yes, I will still be putting 110% into all my responsibilities, but also into myself. In all the years I have spent working and studying, I never took the time to let myself live. I let my work experiences define all of who I am. Now that I have finished my degree, I realize there are so many things that I have the freedom to do. The time I spent studying, reading, and finishing homework I can now spend on things that enrich my character, not my mind.

I finally have the time to take care of myself. Do the things I have wanted to do. Visit friends who live far away. Go out on dates. The world is at my feet, as long as I take the step.

So what now?

Now, I will celebrate my graduation in Las Vegas, bask in the amazing accomplishment, and then get back to work. Except this time, I will not forget to do a little living in between.